Week 104: The Head Tilt – #AlphaFemaleFriday
“ WEEK 104 / 133 – 133 WEEKS TO SUCCESS “
I have the most wonderful Labrador Retriever—granted, that’s what every pet owner says about their family animal friend, but join the club—and whenever he becomes curious, he does a head tilt. He is extremely empathetic: he knows whenever someone is sick and will curl up next to them. He wags his tail when everyone else is excited and cowers in the corner when there’s a tense argument. When I talk to him, he tilts his head, as if to say, “I may not speak your language, but I am listening.”
The same goes for humans. When we want to show that we’re paying attention to what someone else is saying, we tilt our heads. We lean in. Some of us may do this instinctively and not even realize we’re doing it. Others may keep in mind to do it purposefully as a defusing technique. If you ever find yourself in a sticky situation where someone isn’t happy, I have found that half of the battle of defusing a situation is just listening to the other person.
Show the other person that you care about what they have to say. They say the customer is always right. They’re not always right—thank goodness, but you must always give them a chance to speak their piece. They, like you, have every right to speak their mind. Most people, whether they’re standing in front of you, turning red and throwing tantrums, or typing angry reviews via TripAdvisor (did you know that New York City is really noisy? I am SHOCKED!), just want to be heard out.
It’s more challenging to show someone that you’re truly listening when sending an e-mail. If you can’t meet with them in person, pick up the phone. Show that you’re there, and send a follow up e-mail if you must. Be kind and persistent. Do not be harsh if you don’t have to. Most people will listen if you keep it simple and show courtesy. As Samuel Taylor Coleridge said, “Advice is like show—the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind.”
@AlphaFemSociety tweets by @KellyRGonzales
Each week, I take a tip from Lois P. Frankel’s book, Nice Girls Still Don’t Get the Corner Office, and explore how each of these tips affect myself and other women in similar positions on the road to becoming the women we want to be. There are far and few between who are a few steps behind me, and many more who are far advanced. I found that Lois P. Frankel’s advice applied to novice, intermediates, and experts alike. It helped me see that I was already doing right, served as a reminder to keep on doing what I was doing and how to keep that momentum going. The book also showed me areas where I could improve, and gave realistic tips to jump on board. There are a total of 133 tips, and explore one tip per week in a program I call: 133 Weeks to Success.
Join the movement using the hashtag #133WeeksToSuccess with posts which are posted every #AlphaFemaleFriday.