I’ve been working in the concrete jungle of Manhattan the past few weeks, so to balance my cosmopolitan work streak, I’ve recently started gardening as a new hobby. I find it to be relaxing and rejuvenating in many ways. As I sat under some shrubs in my front yard, I realized that cutting down dead trees and pulling weeds was also a great metaphor for dealing with deadened relationships.


In order for us to make room for bigger and better things in our lives as we grow and change, we also need to get rid of the dead weight in our lives. We need to distance ourselves from people who we feel are holding us back. These kinds of people are not necessarily bad human beings with malicious intent. Instead, these people may very well be nice people with good intentions. However, even the nicest people with the best of intentions may still not be giving us what we need in life in order to grow. These kinds of people are like dead trees that do no harm but offer no immediate benefits to us.


Then, there are people in our lives who are like weeds. They pop up into our lives and trespass into our territory without any warning. They are different from dead tree relationships since weed relationships suck out our energy. They take away our ultimate resource: time. It takes a great amount of patience to get rid of these kinds of relationships, but ultimately, once we get rid of these soul suckers from our lives, we realize that we were better off without them.


In order for us to grow in the gardens that are our lives, we need to cut down the dead trees and pull out the weeds. We need to distance ourselves from people who may not be giving us what we’re looking for. We need to be strong enough to take a stance and get rid of the relationships that do more harm than good. We need to take care of ourselves before we take care of others, and the only way can grow is if we acknowledge who or what is holding us back and then follow that acknowledgement by taking action. We must be honest with ourselves and with others. By living authentically, we can bloom into the person we always wanted to be. I look forward to seeing you grow.





@AlphaFemSociety tweets by @BoBellerz


4 thoughts on “Making Room for Growth – #AlphaFemaleFriday

  1. This is your garden?! Wow. Gorgeous. Love the metaphors, Kelly. I resonate with all of them. Also, loving how nature really is such a wonderful teacher. Concrete jungle and nature- I’m loving the ways you are finding to balance the two in your life.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Happy Sunday/Fathers Day, Diahann! Thanks so much. Cutting down the bamboo has been quite a chore, but otherwise, I find it to be a great balance between sitting at a desk 5 days a week to make a living and wrestling with plants on the weekends. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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